how to eat tacos with grace

preparation.

kumuha ng tissue. check.

nakawin ang bib ng pamangkin.check.

titigan ang taco at hanapin ang vulnerable spot (tip na malupit: sa dulo ng taco, bandang kanan..shhh..secret lang natin yan)

syempre dapat mentally prepared tayo.
repeat after me.
ohmm. ohmm. ohmm.
mmmmmmmmmmmmm!




attack!!!

teka.

wag masyado excited.

dahan-dahang angatin ang taco sa kinalalagyan using your 2 hands.
dahan. dahan.

be gentle sa tacos.
pano mo malalaman na gentle ang pagkakahawak mo? kelangan nakataas ang dalawang pinky (hinliliit)

teka.

wag mong gamitan ng tissue ineng. matutunaw lang ang tissue dahil sa sauce, makakain mo lang ung tissue.

ok game na ulit.

dahan- dahang i-alma ang dulo ng taco sa yong bibig.
dahan. dahan.
dahan. dahan.

eps!

wag muna kakagat.

pag nasa bibig na.

kagatin ng dere-deretso.wag hihinga para wag magkaron ang tacos ng pagkakataon na lumaban. kagat.kagat.kagat lang ng kagat. wag pansinin ang mga nahuhulog na kamatis. na repolyo. na basag na taco. o ang nahuhulog na dandruff. pawis. kulangot, sipon, etcetera. concentrate. itodo ang powers sa pagkagat. mamaya ka na huminga. ano ba. kagat. kagat. kagat lang ng kagat.

finish na!

punasan ang bibig ng tissue.

at mag-smile.

ang saya di ba?

teka.

kamusta naman ang bib mo?

ayan. lagot ka sa nanay mo.

maghanap ka ng clorox at ibabad mo muna yan.


p.s.
so asan ang grace dun?
ay. wala ka bang friend na grace ang pangalan?
ay sadness. kawawa ka naman
ako meron eh.
kumain ako nang taco with my friend grace.

sorry. lost in translation. o sha mumog ka na.

5 fundamental laws of stupidity

1. Always and inevitably each of us underestimates the number of stupid individuals in circulation. [ayeen's notes: never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.]
   
2. The probability that a given person is stupid is independent of any other characteristic possessed by that person.[ayeen's notes: has MA? member of MENSA? it doesn't matter. stupidity is like a secret disease.]
   
3. A person is stupid if they cause damage to another person or group of people without experiencing personal gain, or even worse causing damage to themselves in the process. [ayeen's notes: i know a lot who falls in this category]
   
4. Non-stupid people always underestimate the harmful potential of stupid people; they constantly forget that at any time anywhere, and in any circumstance, dealing with or associating themselves with stupid individuals invariably constitutes a costly error.[ayeen's notes: yep, been there, done that and the outcome is NOT good]
   
5. A stupid person is the most dangerous type of person there is. [ayeen: hell yeah!]
   

- from Cipolla's five fundamental laws of stupidity