Friday, December 30, 2011

walking down memory lane

so another year is about to end and 2012 is just around the corner....

and again, like i would always do since i started to learn about dates and time and calendars, i would look at a fresh new calendar, look at each of the months and days and wonder what those dates hold for me... and then i'll start reminiscing about things that have transpired during the last 360+ days and start being nostalgic... i'll find myself taking a walk down the memory lane again and sometimes i would go as far as 4 to 5 years ago...

four years ago was 2007... it was when i made a decision that i have to stop waiting..... as a matter of fact i'm not even sure there's actually something to wait for, so i thought i should just go ahead and do what i have been wanting to do all my life and see where that decision will take me... and so i left the country to try and work in the U.S. .....

2007 was a very rough time for me... i was crying buckets because of home sickness (i thought i never have this problem but when ur surrounded with strangers it will just sprung to life),  because i was missing someone and because i don't have a client and salary for several months and i'm just living off of $100/month allowance that my consultant employer gives me... i was worried that my dwindling savings in the philippines would dry up soon and i won't have money to send my dad.... i was scared there won't be food on the table and they won't be able to pay the utility bills anymore when i dont get a client in time...then ofcourse there's this business of trying to adapt... i also had no relatives in the U.S., no friends that i'm comfortable to pour my heart to.... i was scared about my future and extremely lonely... but alas! i found a solution to my loneliness!
or so i thought...

my solution didn't last, in fact, it actually made matters worst and so the tear ducts giveth, and giveth, and giveth, again, and again... i was left broken that i was cursing myself why i even left my country..... the only consolation i have though after that incident was that i did got myself a permanent full time employment on november of 2007 (2 months after "that" incident) but other aspects of my life are still trying to adapt and it was still downhill for me...

then i decided it's time to bounce back..... i'm alone in this country & nobody's gonna help me through but myself...... so i joined a group, the SFC (Singles for Christ) and attempted to make friends..... but somehow something changed me.... i became too cautious and wasn't as open like when i was back in the philippines....it was too hard for me to open up & be too comfortable with anyone because i'm just too scared to get too dependent and only to one day find myself being abandoned again and to have to adjust to being back to being alone again... i don't want to go through that roller coaster of emotions anymore..... so i try to keep people at arms length but please know that i do love and cherish those handful of selected close friends i have here in the U.S...they've been always there for me even if i sometimes seemed like i just disappeared on the face of the earth..thank you for being there for me, you know who you are...

so it was that way for me... i have my guards up all the time... i bought a cheap used car (my 1st sedan car with 100,000+ miles on it) so i don't have to depend on my friends driving me around... i try to distance myself from my friends and try not to ask favors because i don't want to be a bother to them.. i try not to suffocate them with stories about the not so good things that have been happening to me... i learn how to suffer alone and in silence... i figured they too have their own problems and i dont want to burden them with mine...i have learned to become independent in a whole new different level....

and then august of 2009 came...
i found my GG (God's gift) and things turned 180 degrees after that...its amazing how some twisted turn of events can take you to where you are right now..... it all seemed like all the things i went through and all the things i've said no or yes to all led me to this moment... that's why i'm a firm believer of "everything is half chance" and that "whatever decisions you make can either make or break you"... slowly things keep getting better... and better.. and better... 2010 came and went... then 2011 came...

it was a wonderful 2011 for me... i got engaged... im almost done planning two weddings... have visited 2 new countries... i left my apartment of four years and moved to a house... i have a new pet (a sweet female greyhound)... i changed employer... i'm back working in center city philadelphia (which i always love)... and a lot more small blessings that just keeps piling up!

yes, there's just too many blessings that it overwhelms me sometimes that i tend to get so teary-eyed counting them... there is indeed Someone watching over me...

   
p.s.
looking forward to meeting you 2012...


Monday, December 19, 2011

my last birthday.... as m.cruz


i just celebrated my birthday and i realized that's my last birthday as m.c. because on my next birthday i will be m.n.... no dash for me for practical reason (and which will be a separate blog)...

anyway, this post is really about my wishlist, lol....
i usually blog about my wishlist come september but got too busy and lazy, lol

so here goes, in no paricular order (kunyari excited kayo, lol)

0. macbook pro (but i got this already a few weeks ago as an early bday/christmas gift)
1. airbrush makeup system.
2. YMCA 1 year membership
3. Lightroom 3 for mac
4. mac mouse
5. iphone 4s case
6. issey miyake perfume
7. that photoshop actions im eyeing on.
8. and maybe giftcards from dress barn or macys or charlotte russe

that's it pancit!

Monday, October 10, 2011

battle of the wills

it still amuses me, and dont get me wrong i actually find it sweet, when "common friends" seem like they're the ones who haven't moved on yet.....

for those who still keep asking me the same question, this entry i posted a
month or so ago on my tumblr photo blog might somehow sum it up...


http://bottledmoments.tumblr.com/post/9413865970/day-5-things-u-want-to-say-to-an-ex-what#disqus_thread

 

Sunday, September 18, 2011

all is fair in love and war...

all is fair in love and war...

nothing is out of bounds...

and there are no rules or restrictions....

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

wedding update - january 19

our philippines church wedding would be on January 19  and the U.S. civil wedding is tentatively on May 19.....

 

i think i've mentioned this before but it might be worth reiterating, we're pretty much done with booking our philippines suppliers.... we have booked the venue, church, photographer, videographer, caterer, string quartet, flowers, HMUA since january 2011.... we had to move quick because January is one of the peak months for wedding in the philippines and because our wedding venue is in demand....... and ofcourse, to LOCK the rates! you know how the suppliers are, they increase their price every year! anyway, what's left is the OTD (on-the-day coordinator).... but we might need more than an OTD.... we need a partial wedding planner because i would really need someone to run errands for me since we are an overseas couple....

May 19 is the tentative date for our civil wedding.... i said tentative because we haven't booked our venue yet and unless that is booked we can't claim May 19.... we're still busy with other stuff but hopefully we'll be able to start booking the major suppliers on September til October....i'm actually anxious to book the civil wedding venue because all my project is on halt mode unless we booked the venue....but we try not to get too overwhelmed....i try not to look at the "bigger picture" so i won't panic or get stressed..... one step at a time.... one "To Do" item at a time.... 

right now i'm just busy doing our mock-up WYB DIYs..... and last week i have just decided which design to use..... so excited to give them to our entourage....hopefully they'll all say yes...

the next thing on my plate is to start doing the barefoot sandals mock-ups.....

*WYB - will you be my ...  bridesmaid/maid of honor  groomsman/best man
*DIY - do-it-youself

 

the decisions you make in life define you

 

not the mistakes you did...
not what other people say..

its the decisions and the choices you made...

it doesn't matter if it's the right or wrong decision at that time but what you are right now, what you have become is still the product of those decisions...

so don't make a choice based on what's best for your ego...don't make a decision based on other people's point of view.... use your common sense, follow your heart then balance them out....

 

Friday, August 26, 2011

photo blog

 

since i love to tweet compared to blogging and i like tweeting pix i figured maybe its time to sign up for a photo blog...where i dont need to limit my caption to 140 chars.

here it is: http://bottledmoments.tumblr.com/

 

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

quinoa, my quinoa

 

i have been a fan of quinoa for just almost a year now....

i try to have my blogs organized so i'll just talk more about it here....

http://mindovercookie.blogspot.com/2011/08/i-discovered-quinoa-pronounced-keen-wah.html

 

 

Saturday, August 20, 2011

show me an int'l tour package and I'll make you a DIY version

 

did you see an international tour package from a travel agency's website?
are you travelling in groups?
or travelling solo?
likes backpacking
likes DIY?
want to do the tour logistics yourself but you're too busy?

no problem!

show me the URL of the trip that you want me to DIY-zed and i'll post it here! i'll make sure it's cheaper than that travel agency...... just PM me or post it here, whatever you're most comfortable...

i'll be waiting!

p.s.
this is free don't worry

 

Friday, July 22, 2011

pangarap ni neneng...

i have several online diaries.... and i decided to shut them down one by one....well, not really shut down but its not public anymore..... and there's one blog site i have at xanga that i decided to revisit and have stumbled on this blog (click mo na lang para lumaki):


 it's just funny to think that seven years ago i was dreaming of all those things but i was able to accomplish them one by one... slowly but surely...

1. guitar lessons - check (this year ko lang natapos)
2. camera - check! but not canon (i have nikon D80)
3. coron, puerto princessa - check, check
4. siargao - check
5. pagudpud - check
6. rome, florence, venice, tuscanny, vatican, paris,versailles,geneva (lucerne not geneva) ,  singapore, cairo (soon) , california, new york  - check check check check !

so folks, never give up..... sabi nga ni lenny kravitz "it aint over til its over"!

 

 

Monday, July 18, 2011

mahirap maging masaya...


mahirap maging masaya para sa taong barubal at ginalit ka ng husto....

ang magsabi sa kin ng "move on"  o ng "forgive them"  sasapatusin ko! LOL
obviously hindi ka pa nagalit ng husto para maintindihan ang sinasabi ko.....
o siguro naranasan mo na pero sorry hindi ako plastic at hindi ako holier than thou tulad mo....

ako'y isang simpleng mamamayan na marunong mabuwiset at magalit pag ginawan ng kabalbalan

last,
ang magsabi sa kin ng "bitter" ako itatapon ko sa kumukulong kulangot, haha.
ang may karapatan lang maging bitter yung walang accomplishments sa buhay.(para maging clear, wala akong karapatan maging bitter, read between the lines please. or bili ka ng iodized salt).

super last,
di ko alam pano gawing hindi mukhang galit tong post na to e...hindi ako galit e, sorry to disappoint you,lol..... im just stating a fact....

 

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

DIY europe: Paris-Brussels-Amsterdam-Frankfurt-Luxembuorg: for only $870.57



$395     - Eurail for 5 Countries first class for 15 days
   78.84 - Paris 2 Nights Accomodation in a 4 bed mix dorm ($39.42/night)
   87.34 - Brussels 2 Nights Accomodation Twin Private Ensuite ($43.67/night)
 106.14 - Amsterdam 2 Nights Accomodation - Twin Private Shared Bath ($53.07/night)
   94.39 - Frankfurt 2 Nights Accomodation - Twin Private Shared Bath ($45.98 and $48.90)
   69.44 - Luxembuorg 2 Nights Accomodation - 6 Bed Dorm ($34.72/night)
   39.42 - 1 Night Accomodation Paris in a 4 bed mix dorm ($39.42/night)
----------------
$870.57

for more info: Backpack Europe!
Paris-Brussels-Amsterdam-Frankfurt-Luxembuorg: DIY for only $870.57

 

let's do a little math, shall we...

$1,700 - $870.57 =  $829.43 <-- the amount you'll save! if you notice that's almost twice the amount and it does look like YOU are the one paying for their tour coordinator's euro trip.....either that or the lanyard and t-shirts are just that expensive....

 

want a better deal? for almost the same price ($1,729.00 ) and same number of days you can see more interesting places..... how does rome-pisa-florence-venice-austria-switzerland-paris-london sounds?

go to:
http://www.cosmos.com/product.aspx?content=itin&trip=15910

shop wisely! don't get ripped off!
backpacking means cheaper....



 

Friday, May 13, 2011

everything in life is half chance?


everything in life is half chance...

things happened because you chose "no" over the "yes" or because you chose "yes" over "no".... and things won't happen as it is now if you chose the opposite...

make your decisions wisely...it will either make or break you....

 

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

dont let other people define you..


you are born a superstar  and it's up to you how you would keep it that way....

don't let other people define you....


Wednesday, April 20, 2011

ego does weird stuff

 

before you do something, anything, make sure it's for the right reason and it's not just your ego talking....

ego does weird stuff sometimes.....

i should know, at one point i allowed my ego to rule over me and the outcome was nasty...

 

Friday, April 01, 2011

i won't stoop down to your level


hate me all you want....... spread lies....... continue convincing yourself that you haven't done anything wrong....... continue planting lies on other people's head because you want their sympathy....... continue doing that malicious evil deeds of yours..... continue being the pathetic person that you strive to be....


i wouldn't care anymore....
and no i won't stoop down to your level.......
i would stand up, dust the dirt away, lift my head up and go the other direction....


i'll continue to shrug my shoulders and walk away from all the lies you spread and all the harsh words you uttered......  i'll continue to ignore you as if you're just a speck of annoying dust....... i'll continue doing things that i know you can't and will not be able to do......i'll continue going to places that you can never see nor reach (or atleast make sure i'll get there first)........ i'll continue to love which i know you are never capable of because of all the hatred in your heart.....


today, i'm turning my back away from all that is selfish, unjust and loathful  which you so represents...... because from now on i'll always walk in love.....


and i am forgiving you.....


for hurting me...
for spreading lies about me....
for destroying my dreams....


no i won't take revenge......
there's higher power who can do that for me.....and when that higher power finally decided to give you that "whip" of bad karma you'll remember me...... oh yes, you'll remember me....

Saturday, March 12, 2011

don't underestimate the power of karma

 

ahh..

i knew someday those who needs to pay will pay.... that i don't even have to take matters into my own hands...

thank you bad karma for teaching the scoundrels of the world....

what goes around, comes around....

 

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

fondest memories of you and me

 

i only have the fondest memories of you and me, i hope it will stay that way

 

 

Monday, February 28, 2011

as the dust on my bookshelves as my witness


..... i am going to start reading again...

last book i have finished reading was fountainhead by ayn rand and that was a year ago....

i'm hoping to finish all the books on my shelf before i decide to buy one of those ebook readers.....


so, if you'll excuse me....it's time to bond with einstein's dreams....


on being irritated

 

if you find yourself irritated over someone's happiness, there's something wrong w/ u...
 
 

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Wedding Preps on Hiatus

we have already booked and paid the deposits for the major wedding suppliers so it's time to chill..... Philippines wedding preps would commence late this year or early next year.....

our wedding in the Philippines is a long way off (im sure you know that already) but january is a peak month for weddings in the Philippines (along with december) and if we want to get the suppliers we want we need to book them&nbsp;as early as possible.....

so yep!


church booked
venue booked and deposit paid
photographer&nbsp; booked and deposit paid
videographer booked and deposit paid
HMUA booked and deposit paid (this isn't really part of my plan but my HMUA has a very good deal that time that&nbsp;i can't pass!)


also, since we booked&nbsp;the **customized &nbsp;worry-free package from fernbrook, the caterer, string quartet, bar and florist is part of the contract and all we had to do is tell them our choice of suppliers for these and it would be as good as booked! well, hopefully because&nbsp;the way things are with my AE&nbsp;not replying on time worries me.....&nbsp;we actually just want to block our dates with our chosen suppliers for peace of mind,&nbsp;that's it..... and we won't talk to them about the details until after a year.....


anyway, here are the suppliers we chose:((hidden for privacy))


** customized = no&nbsp;photographer, videographer &amp; on-the-day coordinator (OTD)

on travel factor

someone asked me how i was doing and asked me about travel factor....
that's always a sensitive subject for me...
yes i was the backbone..... yes i spearheaded the surfvivor and photoholic series..... yes i authored the debut tour packages because during that time i was the most well-travelled among us owners (look at all my photo albums and look at the dates for proof)........ yes i was there while travel factor's doing its baby steps, i was doing marketing, sales, creating tour logistics, i was there to supply all initial contacts and clients......... yes , they know im leaving for the states, which means they could have decided not to get me as part of the corporation even before i left for the US...... yes they kicked me to the curb because according to them (1) i can't do fulltime with travel factor (both L and T are the only fulltime owners that time) and (2) they need someone who is physcially in the Philippines (i have their emails to prove that statement)..... L is now in the U.S. they want someone who is physically in the Philippines, heh? so what happened to L then? bunch of liars...... yes, i went to the US to better support my family (my partners are rich, they have cars and businesses...i am not...ofcourse they can do full time, i can't, i need to bring food on the table).....

no they didn't do the legal way of taking one of the corporation owners out....
and no they didn't give me any salary or share of profit or anything to compensate me for my almost 2 years of service.... they didn't even acknowledge that if it wasn't for me they won't be where they are right now.... bunch of ungrateful thieves....

and no they didn't inform me formally, just an email and they started ignoring me since then....

no i didnt sue them..... no , i didnt destroy them..... no , i didnt asked my friends, colleagues or everyone i know to boycott them......and no i didn't take revenge (i could if i want to)..... i just blog about them...... ever heard of freedom of speech?

yes , i'm very happy right now...... i've made the best decision of not giving up my day job...... one thing i learned, i could set up my own travel agency again but but getting back in track to being a software engineer isn't as easy specially if you haven't done any programming even for just a year...
yes , i have accomplished things that my adversaries cant and havent, thanks to good karma
yes , i no longer have the bragging rights of being an owner of that company but at least i have a clean conscience and i know i didnt step on anyone's foot and i haven't treated anyone unfairly to climb my way to the top.......
yes , i'm living a fabulous life and i dont need to spend sleepless nights just to earn that single piece of centavo..... i have a fully functional left side of the brain that does complex algorithms and mathematical equations and problem solving to earn a living....

now, please stop asking me about travelfactor.....my only advise is be careful dealing and doing business with people who doesn't know how to treat people fairly and justly....

'nuff said.....

if you want to read more of what happened: from inception to deception

Friday, February 25, 2011

deleting all my multiply.com contacts...


hi folks!

i just want to give everyone a heads-up that i would be deleting all my contacts soon and would just re-add them again.....please, please don't get offended......

 

here's why i have to do that (aside from OCD attack, haha):

1. i'm in the process of fixing the "relationship" status (ie:  friends, business contacts, colleagues, etc)  

2. i have to delete some that i don't recognize..........

3. this is also a way for me to know whether those in my contact list is "still" comfortable having me as one of their contacts so it's kinda 2 birds in one stone.......

 

i'll be re-adding all my friends, contacts, colleagues with the proper "relationship" status and i'm very sure i'll be forgetting some people so if that's you please please don't be embarrassed to give me a shout so i could add you back or just add me back.....please.... promise you'll do that?

thank you!

 

feeling loved loved loved..

 

*insert jason mraz "i'm yours" lyrics here*

i feel so elated today!

..... and feeling oh-so inspired!

for the past weeks i was on the lookout for ideas for non-floral bouquets..... don't get me wrong, i love flowers! (my fave is peach and white roses, by the way *hint-hint nudge-nudge* LOL) but these wedding bouquets are so expensive and we all know what happens a few days after the wedding, they die!

so i was looking at some alternatives and i found one that got me really really excited!

one. because i get to keep it forever
two. it can serve as an heirloom
three. it's unique
four. i get to do it myself!

the only downside is the cost would be as expensive, if not more, than the real flowers but hey! atleast it won't die! and since my wedding is still a long way off i have enough time to gather all my "ingredients" and to experiment and perfect how to do it..... and hopefully ("hopefully" as the operative word)  i'll get to make some for my entourage too....that would be my gift to them when they accept my "will-you-be" card...

 fun fun fun!

i love DIY stuff!

p.s.
i'll be starting a separate
wedding blog soon so i could document all the
DIY and wedding preps adventure
mywedding.com kinda has limitations
& i dont like how their blog is laid out

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

best revenge of all?

what's the best revenge of all? HAPPINESS.....
nothing drives your enemies crazier than seeing you have a good and fabulous life...

specially when they can't have what you have and they can't achieve what you can achieve....

Sunday, February 20, 2011

on very expensive photo/videos: status symbol or really just a fan?


some of you already know i'm starting to prepare for my wedding and like any OC brides, i have devoured the online profiles of couturier,  photographers, videographers, caterers, photobooth suppliers, HMUA, even the headband suppliers...name it, i have looked at them...


from this excercise i have discovered a lot of things both from fellow brides and myself...... i noticed why some couple book a certain famous so-and-so and while some would just get the lowest photographer package from another so-and-so..... their reason can range from limited budget, practicality or because they are a big fan or simply just for status symbol....


when i was told about this certain famous videographer i decided to watch as many SDEs (same day edit, 3-5 min video) from that famous videographer as i can...... some are jaw-dropping but some are, well, so-so....... and when i looked at the videos of some of the not-so-famous and other budding videographersi was pleasantly surprised! if someone showed me their videos and wouldn't tell me who made it i could have mistaken it as from a famous so-and-so......


same goes with wedding photographers..... i've seen wedding photos from famous photographers who charges 100,000-150,000 and those budding photographers who charges 35,000 - 55,000..... when i looked at their portfolios i was wowed by both 100K and 35K photographers.... what a famous photographer can do, the budding artists can do too.......


when we choose photographers and we look at their online portfolios we need to understand that what they're posting on their website are only their best photos..... i mean, that's a no-brainer, that's their advertisement ofcourse they'll only post the good ones...... and these good ones are, most often than not, are already "processed" photos....... some photographers might deny that fact, they may or may not be telling the truth and we can't prove it so we are left to trust our own judgement and instinct...... we have to take everything with a grain of salt......


so.....having gone thru all this selection-dumping process i also observe other brides/engaged couples...... and their "shopping" criteria amuses me to no end ......... ah the psychology of it all!  so why do you think others still decide to take a leap and get the expensive ones when they know they can find someone who is as good but not as expenisve? why do you think some of them took a blind eye on this budding artists and get the expensive ones?


i have a theory....

1. status symbol - they may be thinking "heck! we wouldn't want a certain whats-his-face-i-cant-even-remember-their-name to cover our wedding! our guests would think we're cheap or worst broke! que horror!"

2. they're really just a fan - they might have followed his/her career for so long and its just non-negotiable for them and they really have to get them.


as for me, i have seen some of the worst and corny and also the best (atleast in my opinion) wedding SDEs out there by a 150K videographers and 10K videographers..... i have also seen the worst & best photos of the many expensive photographers in the Philippines and the ones from the neophyte in the industry........ and for me,  it all boils down into one......if i can't justify the rate their asking and i know there are other suppliers in the industry who can provide me with the same jaw-dropping SDE's or photo, then i'm not getting the expensive ones...... i'm actually more attracted to "budding" artists....those "promising" videographers and photographers.....the  "uncommercialized" ones who do their crafts from the "heart"........ that i know, from every click of their camera or every second of their video is taken with passion and they don't treat me as just another client...... who they can't wait to get done with so they can proceed to the next one..... i'm not after the fame or for the status symbol...... i don't strive to impress anyone by the suppliers i choose........ i'm all for practicality but not sacrificing the quality......... and yes, i can have both adjectives in the same sentence and i can find someone who possess both........

p.s.
i'm not saying it's downright ridiculous to
get the expensive ones...
just make sure that whoever you're getting,
expensive or not, are for the
right reasons...


p.p.s.
curious about our short list?

video:
- cinemaworks - http://johndeguzmandv.com/
- DLS - http://danielleistudio.com
- SKT - http://sktdigital.com.ph/blog/


photo:
- atty fortun - http://raymond42n.multiply.com
- j lucas reyes - http://www.jlucasreyes.com/
- vignette studios - http://vignettephotographystudio.com/



*SDE - same day edit...a 3-5 min editted video shown during the reception which shows the preparation, ceremony and some few parts of the early part of the reception

 

Saturday, February 19, 2011

on haters

"haters don't hate you, they hate themselves, because you're a reflection of what they wish to be. .."

bato bato sa langit...

Thursday, February 10, 2011

complain, complain

complaining about someone's posts is like complaining about what's showing on tv and you have the remote control on your hand...

dear, turn it off (x-out) or switch channels...simple as that....

i'm just saying...

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

twitter account

here's my unofficial one..

http://twitter.com/bluemarlinfish

before you criticize your adversaries look in the mirror first..

dear you,

yes you who have been secretly reading my blogs to see if i wrote something about you again...

do  you really think you're a saint of some sort? do you really think what you've done is noble? do you expect a medal for that? how pathetic. before you criticize your adversaries look at yourself in the  mirror first and ask yourself if you have been fair to them, if you haven't stepped on anyone's foot.....

let's rewind for a bit...... before all "these" happened..... did i ever give you a hard time? have i been mean to you?& nbsp;didn't i support your decision.... wasn't i always on your side when the going gets tough? didn't i help in making things a reality? didn't i support you all the way?

now, fast forward..... i started "giving you a piece of my mind" after you have hurt me........ ofcourse, i'll be mad at what you did.....why, what do you expect me to do? just smile and take all the beating you're giving me without as much as a wince? dear, i'm not a saint (atleast i dont pretend to be one like what you're doing)....... if you threw rocks at me, hell, i'm not going to throw you bread, i'll throw those rocks back to you..... i'm sure you'll do the same thing.... that's what you're doing right now..... you're retaliating..... our only difference is i deserve to get mad at you first because you did me wrong...... your retaliation is just base on satisfying your ego, you don't like being wrong...... you can't accept it when someone pointed out to you that you're wrong.....

here's another thing to think about..... what kind of retaliation did i do.... did i destroy you? did i do any malicious thing? did i start mass emailing everyone (i have all the contacts, yes) to stop using you? nope.... i just blog away.... and i make sure you can see it (unlike what you're doing), that all your other friends can see it....... i'm not a coward, i don't back stab people...... whenever i have something to say i'll make sure you can see them, i dont "hide" my blogs because  i dont want you to think i say things behind your back..... so it's either it's "public"  or if its for "friends only" i make sure your "friends" can see it so they can show it to you......


now for the bad news......

i'm sorry but you are not an angel so please stop acting as if you're the victim, you're not........ and no matter how you turn things upside down you have treated people very very unjustly........ you stepped on someone's soul just to satisfy your ego......  you didn't think things over before you made a decision about that important stuff......... you're very impulsive....... you're greedy, you're insensitive, you're two-faced and yes, you're, sorry for lack of better words, a bitch.......


but you know what..... if you had think things carefully..... if you made sure everything was done in a fair, just manner we wouldn't have this strife.....  i just don't like the way i was treated...... you treated me like a filthy rug as if i didnt contribute anything...... why did you do that? why didnt you talk to me personally to tell me what's on your mind...... why didn't you tell me how you feel...... i'll understand..... believe me, i will.....  but what did you do, you resorted to some drastic, cowardly and unfair measures...... so not cool...... and to top it all, you insulted me...... that's like putting salt on the wound.....

anyway, i hope you're happy now.... i hope this is the life you want to have.... a life full of deceit and anger and jealousy..... i hope you can sleep well at night.....

no, im not bitter.....  how vain of you to think that i am...... none of your accomplishment would make me feel bitter and/or jealous...... i just want you to realize where & what you've done wrong..... and i want you to remember that you wouldn't be where you are right now if i wasn't part of the equation..... ofcourse, you're too proud to admit that..... but that's ok....

 

- ayeen

p.s.
how am i? im fabulous!
its true what they say,
when someone slams a door at you
God opens a window....
and that window is gold-plated..
the door you slammed at me
is as rotten as your heart...

 

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

mukhang guilty...


ang tao minsan nakakatawa.
lalo na kapag guilty sila
feeling nila ang lahat ng sulat ko'y tunkol sa kanila.
hindi ko tuloy mapigilang hindi mapatawa.

ayokong basagin ang trip mo.
sino ka ba. hindi ka naman importante sa buhay ko.
wag kang magpusong-mamon
bakit naman kita pag-aaksayahan ng panahon.

so please lang.
tama na ang ka-vain-an ha.
nagmumukha ka tuloy na timang.
at lagi ka tuloy napapahiya.

which one are you?

whenever your announce your accomplishments you will notice those you know will be divided in half....

(1) those who are genuinely happy for you (the secure & confident group)
and
(2) who would call you all types of bad adjectives and/or thinks you're bragging (the BIJ group - bitter, insecure and jealous)

which one are you?

im not bragging

my apologies if you think i'm bragging...
im not.
i'm just counting my blessings...
you should count your blessings too.
try it.
its more fun than harboring hate and being bitter.

try it.

Friday, February 04, 2011

everything just fall into place..



a few years back i was questioning my frontal lobe's abilities......  i lost a lot of the important aspects of my life which often prompted me to question my ability to make decisions...... im questioning myself why i bothered to leave the philippines.....i wasn't sure anymore if it was worth the risk of leaving my comfort zone...

but somehow things fall into place....
 

i dreamt of having my own (yes not shared, solo) cute little apartment that i can practice my decorating prowess (or more like lack off, lol) and i got it

i dreamt of driving my own dream SUV and i got it

i dreamt of finding a full time job as a software engineer in the U.S. with a very good salary and benefits and i got it

i dreamt of getting a permanent resident status in a foreign country and i got it

i dreamt of touring europe and i got it

i dreamt of finding the man who would propose to me and would tell me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and i got it


it's like solving a crossword puzzle....... you make a few mistakes, you erase and try again, another mistake, erase and try again.... you have to solve and go through a lot of crosses but  somehow before you know it you have just completed your crossword puzzle.....


after all the endless crying over scoundrels and cheaters and backstabbers and murderers of the souls led me to strive to pick up the pieces of my broken self and patch it up... it led me to try hard and achieve the things that my adversaries haven't achieved yet (im talking in general here, don't be so vain to think this is all about you).....all the heartbreaks i have to go through are like my northern star that led me to meet this wonderful man whom i would share his name soon.....


after i stumbled and fell, after the bruises and bumps...after all these, i was able to complete my life's crossword puzzle.....

 everything just fell into place..


p.s.
my apologies if you think i'm bragging...
im not.
i'm just counting my blessings...
you should count your blessings too.
try it.
its more fun than harboring hate and being bitter.

 

Monday, January 31, 2011

stop throwing insults

don't insult anyone...

just because you're taste is different from them...
just because your expectations are different from them...
just because it's not the "norm"...

taste, expectations and "norm" is relative...and you're NOT perfect, so stop acting as if you are..

stop hating.


Tuesday, January 18, 2011

where i've been to so far..i've only just scratched the surface..

where i've been to so far..i've only just scratched the surface..

i'm hoping to visit 2-3 asian countries plus 2-3 philippine beaches when i go home to the philipipnes to take care of my wedding preps...

cheers to all traveholics!


Thursday, January 06, 2011

how much for a european trip?


it costs me $1,800... for 9 countries...

london-belgium-luxembuourg-austria-switzerland-italy-france-monaco-liechtenstein

excluding airfare and excluding optional tours/activities(please see below for the optional tours/activities)... they excluded the airfare because not everyone is coming from the U.S...like in our group, 75% are from australia (i love listening to them talk).... if you opt to not avail of their optional tours/activities you'll have a lot of free time to do stuff on your own.... we didn't book all their optional tours because there are stuff they don't offer that we want to do (see items below with *)  either that or it's because we figured we could save more by doing some tours on our own....

$1,800 also excludes the extra nights that i booked independently in london and paris.....


$1,800 includes:

-
-  chartered motor coach (from london all the way to paris, very very very very, did i say very? convenient and we get to see a lot of stuff and everything is door-to-door)
- ship fare from london to calais, france (this is to cross the border)
- chartered water taxi to venice
- 14 nights hotel accomodation (3-4 star hotels, not hostels, 2 pax sharing)
- breakfasts everyday
- 5 lunches
- 3 dinners
- porters - this is heaven-sent since our bag is heavy! (it's winter time & d trip is 16 + 4 days ofcourse our bags are heavy!)
- trivia and commentary & history lessons - i enjoyed listening to the commentary of our tour guide..specially about the history part..it pays to have a very knowledgeable tour guide and it's nice to know what the heck we're looking at, lol....


what are the tours included:
- switzerland day tour
- rome city tour
- glass blowing in venice
- perfume making in france (eze)
- paris city tour
- luxembuorg side trip
- austria side trip
- monte carlo (monaco) side trip
- st. francis of assisi side trip


what are the optional tours we availed or booked on our own:
- *priority boarding at the london eye w/ mulled wine
- cruise on lake lucerne
- climb to mt.titlis (alps of switzerland)
- gondola ride in venice
- special christmas lunch in rome
- *river cruise in seine at paris
- *priority entry to the eiffel tower (includes ride up to d 1st floor and dinner at a restaurant inside the eiffel tower - restaurant 58 tour eiffel)
- louvre tour - its better to do this via tour group to skip the long lines
- versailles tour - same with this
- * dinner at tour montparnasse (restaurant le ciel de paris)

*we booked this on our own



some notes if you're thinking of doing a european trip:
london:
london is very easy to navigate, just get a train map....london sightseeing is 22 euros (or $29)...you might want to book for sight-seeing if you don't have enough time because with chartered bus it cuts your commute time from point a to point z since everything is door-to-door....but if you have a day or 2 to spare it'll be more fun to use public transportation....

DIY or not:
if you're planning to do a european tour thru a travel agency, i suggest you do it with a travel agency that has the european trip down to a science...not those who just did the tour once or twice or thrice but hundreds of times.... believe me, if you want your tour to be smooth sailing you have to do it with a trustful travel agency otherwise it would just be a nightmare! if the travel agency you're booking with is not that experienced for trips in europe you're better off doing it DIY (do-it-yourself) with your friends, aside from the experience with DIY and w/ inexperienced travel agency is the same, it would be much much cheaper....

cosmos.com <--- they have the european trip down to a science! highly, highly recommended!


my trip is both DIY and thru a travel agency..
london DIY:
we arrived in london a few days early because we want to go to a few other places they dont offer...it was a lot of fun! i got to master their train system.... thank you oyster card...

paris DIY:
we stayed in paris for a few days too.... and yes, i can proudly say i also have mastered their subway system.... since the tour ended on the 30th we got to stay in paris for a few more days and i can honestly say, that yes, i can tour you in paris cause i know where the cool stuff are thanks to their very efficient public transportation... thank you carnet...

if you want tips for a DIY european trip drop me a line.... don't get ripped off by people claiming to give backpacking european trip.... backpacking should be cheaper, no offense to that travel agency, i'm just saying this as-a-matter of fact and not to put them down or anything......

 from cosmos.com the cheapest european tour is $1,100 and they're a big and very respectable travel agency and they know europe..... cosmos doesn't do backpacking but they're still cheaper than the other travel agency claiming to do europe backpacking.......... what i saw from another travel agency is sort of a false advertisement, again, im not putting them down im just protecting the consumers and giving them choices.... if you don't believe me go  to http://cosmos.com/Vacations/Europe/Panoramas/

by the way, cosmos.com don't just cater for US residents....like i said, 75% of my companions are from australia...the others, if you're curious, are from indonesia (their starting point was singapore), south africa, bahrain & ofcourse US.... they also take it seriously if you're vegetarian or not or if you need some special help while travelling (like if u use canes, etc.).

there you go fellow traveholics -  "shop wisely"

 

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